Originally published on 19th February 2018
Flawsome is the new awesome!
We all want to be awesome. But how can we possibly feel awesome if we’re constantly concentrating on our flaws? Flaws are an integral part of our existence, some are visible and some are not. We don’t know how to feel good and co-exist with our flaws, that’s a problem. Learn to be flawsome!
Have you heard the awesome story “The Cracked Pot”!
A Water Bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on each end of a pole which he carried across his neck. One pot had a crack in it, and the other pot was perfect. The perfect pot delivered full water at the end of the long walk from the stream to his house. The cracked pot, on the other hand, arrived only half full. This continued for a very long time.
The perfect pot was proud of its accomplishment, but the cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfection. After two years of what it perceived to be a failure, it spoke to his Master, “I am ashamed of myself, I want to apologize to disappoint you.”
“Why?” asked his Master. “Why are you disappointed?”
“I’m ashamed of myself because this crack in my side causes water to leak all the way back to your house. Because of my flaws, you do all of this work, and you don’t get full value from your efforts,” the pot said.
The Water Bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion, he said, “As we return to the house, did you notice the beautiful flowers along the path.” The cracked pot instantly noticed beautiful flowers on the side of the path. “Now, look at the other pot’s side. There were flowers only on your side of your path because I have always known about your flaws. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you’ve watered them. For two years, I have decorated flowers on my table. Your imperfection made it possible.”
The cracked pot was Flawsome!
Being Flawsome isn’t going to happen overnight. It takes immense work, dedication and will to learn/unlearn. But practicing self-acceptance will give you everlasting happiness. Self-acceptance isn’t going to happen overnight. It takes extensive work and considerable dedication. But learning how to love yourself right and treat yourself well can impact the way you live your life and the things you’re able to accomplish. I know I am awesome, but it won’t do any good till I don’t shun the voices that let me down. When I accepted my flaws, I became flawsome.
In a New York Times interview, Clifford Nass – a professor of communications at Stanford University – explains, “Negative emotions generally require more thinking, and the information is processed more thoroughly than positive ones.” The extra brain power that’s required to process negative emotions means we spend more time contemplating the bad stuff and less time on the good stuff. – Huffington Post
Here are seven ways to kickstart your journey to be Flawsome:
Believe in yourself
The ability to believe in yourself is the key to success. It is important that you trust your dreams and decisions, regardless of what others say. You will find many critics in your life. Absorb constructive criticism and work on it but don’t let projected criticism affect you.
“Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions … do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” –Tina Fey
Celebrate your strengths
I have realized that we tend to spend most of our time and energy on focusing our weaknesses compared to our positive traits. It can be because of the self-esteem that’s breeding inside our mind or it can be a result of the constant comparison. It is extremely important to identify and focus on your strength and outsource or ask for help regarding the areas which you consider as your weakness. If finances is one of your weaknesses, seek the assistance of an accountant or a financial advisor like Daniel Lerner and David Lerner Associates. By outsourcing your finances, you’ll be able to pay off debt, start an investment portfolio, and save for future success – an achievement worthy of celebration! Even if your columns don’t add up perfectly, remember that your strengths make you truly Flawsome! Stop comparing yourself. Be positive.
“Accept yourself, your strengths, your weaknesses, your truths, and know what tools you have to fulfill your promises.” – Steve Maraboli
I read something worth a thought last week and I still couldn’t take it out of my mind. “Science indicates that the human brain has a negativity bias, which means, according to psychologist Rick Hanson, Ph.D., “the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones.” Because of this bias, you need to intentionally create a high ratio of positive events to negative events.”- The Chopra Center
Gratitude has the endless health benefits. It gives you a sense of belonging and also, allows you to feed your brain with some positive thoughts. Take a break from your busy life and notice things you’re thankful for. It’s not difficult to infuse gratitude into your life and take stock of all the positive things in life.
Perfection is an illusion. Don’t try to fit the mold of “Perfection”. Embrace your value, your talent and be confident in your skin. True confidence lies deep within our skin and not from what’s on the outside. When you accept yourself, you look your true identity. When you look only at your imperfections and downplay other aspects, you ignore your true-worth.
Confront your fears
When we are moving towards our dreams, fear of failure is inevitable and logical. We have two choices: we can let it prevent us from fulfilling our goal or we can use it to boost our motivation. Fear of failure has a twin sister – procrastination. This not only kills valuable time but also affects our approach towards fear. You don’t have to immediately defeat your fear. Use it in your brainstorming session and find a solution to your fear. Face your fear!
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” – Winston Churchill.
Forgive but don’t Forget
Forgiving is not a synonym of forgetting. Forgiving is like accepting what happened and forgetting loses the lesson. Which obviously we don’t want!
Don’t hold a grudge. Just let it go!
“Forgive but do not forget, or you will be hurt again. Forgiving changes, the perspectives. Forgetting loses the lesson.”- Paulo Coelho
Let Go toxic people
Negative people have only one goal in mind- to bring you down. They will tell you 99 reasons why you can’t achieve your goals or drag you down to their level. Sometimes it is easier to find faults in others than fixing the faults in their own life. They have a problem with every solution. Stay away from toxic people.
“The worst person to be around is someone who complains about everything and appreciates nothing.”
You don’t have to be awesome, you have to be flawsome to reach your personal and professional goals.
Sometimes we are Awesome because of our flaws. What are the flaws that make you awesome? Are you flawsome?
Share your thoughts.
Lots of love,